Suburbia, IL

Suburbia, Illinois

For Tristan and Jon

“Slums may well be breeding grounds of crime, but middle-class suburbs are incubators of apathy and delirium”  -CyrilConnolly

The suburbs. You hear the words, “American suburb,” and instantly,  the image(s) of either verdant, sprinkler-tended lawns enclosed by white picket fences  or automaton-like (kill this?) Stepford Wives mulling around an ominous dark underbelly of diabolical repression dah dah dah dah dah go dancing in your head. The truth was a little of both. Everyone has crowd/circle (no not here)

(great author?) They say (s?): _________________

But really, dah dah dah dah dah-dah-dah. Everyone has a crowd/a circle/a ….

We grew up in the suburbs. There’s nothing to make one feel so mediocre, right off the bat, than having to admit they hail from some little suburb. Ask the person where they grew up, and inevitably he or she will pause, the obscure truth teetering upon their tongues for a moment, before they simplify things: “Cincinatti,” they will say, “Seattle,”  or “Atlanta,” but really, a fellow suburbanite will know that the answer is more like, “___,” or ____, or ____. it’s better to be either from small small town” or maybe if you are coming from city this is better because if then make for either one extreme: little big:. in between bad.

We grew up in the suburbs of Chicago, Illinois, in middling (?) towns you’ve never heard of– do you really want to know their names?  Medinah. Roselle. Itasca and Bloomingdale. See? In our cases, it’s easier to just say “Chicago,” or “near Chicago,” and so that’s what we do.+

The suburb has always been trying to be the city, and to escape it, at once.  Major roads and railways Branching out from the cities like tributaries carrying …it was along these that the drugs came…

See the Sam’s Club, in all its colossal, buy-in-bulk enormity, King Kong-like front doors looming like the gates behind which King Kong-size containers of mustard and and laundry detergent sit shelves, and the mothers proudly lugging them out to their minivans. “The smart way to shop,” they all say with….proud…pride….”in bulk, see?”

See the….

Now see the son, sitting at a stop light…grey, to grey, to grey…, a quarter of a kilo of cocaine beneath the seat…

He lays down in a box garden of assorted flowers, and in the morning the cars drive by…people going to work…suburbanites going to work….thing stuff…thinking, “he must be sleeping.” how silly he’ll feel when he wakes up. “Not really dead, just a bad seed, idiot, miscreant” is what you want them thinking as they drive by in the morning (early morning milky whatever better than milky) light (maybe even avoid ‘Light’)

See the local h.s.?//

The Chicago Housing Authority…began tearing the projects down…they began demolishing the projects in…demolition charges and Wrecking balls bringing the fail…s…down in chalky clouds,,,get poetic on the clouds here…. of chalk and demolition charges

They crop up maybe… huddle around the cities, roads and railroads like spiderwebs Or maybe the city gives birth to the suburbs, the suburbs hung on the roads and railways strethcing out like spider webs, the suburbs hung. Connected. The city vaguely feels the tremors of the happenings in the suburbs, but for the suburbs the city looms largely and darkly, dictating its every …move…thing…

“The U.S. Open is  in Medinah this year, you know,” they would say, pride…dah dah dah. “That means Medinah is on T.V. How ’bout that. Pretty cool, huh?

We never knew….

didn’t know any better.

Riding our bikes and blah blah blah ….take it from the suspiciously subjective biography!!! here. Lazy summer days. It was quite nice, the early days, as childhood tends to be…

The drugs

The town

The people

The music:  we listened to hip hop, we listened to gangster rap. the west coast was at war with the east coast; nobody really knew why, but it was Tupac Vs. Biggie, which side were you on? when Biggie got shot I cried. When Tupac got hit a __ later, you knew that somehow the words on the discs meant more than just…videos…discs…suburban wannabes. It was something more serious than us.

Cabrini Green, __-, ___, ____ were being torn down. DETAILS. on when and when and when each got torn down, razor sharp concision and precision, like a historian. The displaced tenants flooded the suburbs –many of them showed up in neighboring Bensonville, in Elgin, in ___ (Maywood?) the diaspora walked a little harder than us, talked a little harder, we knew they were the real thing and so they became the images after which we tried to make ourselves in. And

When we were in elementary school, the U.S. Open came to Medinah, owing to the Medinah Country Club. The town of Medinah was actually named after the Medinah Country Club, in what must be a rare case of such a thing happening…

…Medinah and Roselle have pact,, connected, share L,P. H.S, like two friends…fending off…together…back to back small towns small towns back to back…

All of this was the pride of our little corner of the Chicago suburbs. Medinah’s claim to fame. The town of Medinah was actually named after the country club,

inevitably say

ominous Stepford Wives dark underbellies of repressed

the more adventurous of us looked to the city.

The area surrounding the current Village of Roselle began to be settled in the early 1830s, as settlers moved in next to the native Potawatomi Indians. Silas L. Meacham and his brothers Harvey and Lyman settled the area now known as Bloomingdale Township. The government had been offering land in the area for around $1.25 / acre. In 1837, Deacon Elijah Hough and his wife settled in the Bloomingdale area, with his sons Oramel, Rosell [sic] and daughter Cornelia.

In 1868, at the age of 48, Rosell Hough returned from a career as an alderman and a businessman in Chicago, and saw that the area had become a farming center for corn and flax. He opened the Illinois Linen Company on the northwest corner off of what is now Roselle Road and Irving Park Road. Hough was also the president of the Chicago and Pacific Railroad Company. It is rumored that because of his position, he spent some money to alter a land survey to show that a railroad line should run through Roselle, Itasca and Wood Dale instead of Addison andBloomingdale. The new train schedule is believed to have misprinted the name of the new town on the new rail line, giving Roselle its current name.[5]

Medinah is home to the Medinah Country Club, which hosted the USGA US Open in 1990, 1975, 1949, 1946, and 1937. Medinah also hosted the 1999 and 2006 PGA Championships. The club is scheduled to host the 2012 Ryder Cup.

The drugs flowed…like ether…ether…they came in, in dah, dah and in dah, in bricks of __ and dah of dah, dah dah dah to dah make you dah dah dah, waiting at stop lights, grey, to grey, to grey, we )__

Though We All Know Joe Was An Atheist, Still,  Now Is The Time For Staying On Topic When Posting To His Obituary Guestbook

To the family, my deepest condolences, and why would a just God give someone a peanut allergy? Proof of imperfection. Evoulution. Pro atheist.

X. An innocent (but one who pushes it forward)

X. Hardcore atheist. (2)

X. Religious Person (2)

X. Rabbi comes in out of no where.

X Scientist (Geneticist?) comes in out of no where.

X. moderator intervenes.

X. Mother chides everyone (?)

X. An innocent.  (subtly pushes it forward)

Comment 1:  Peanut allergy. Joe, in all the years we went to school together, I never knew anything about a peanut allergy. I guess those things can develop as an adult. You were one of the funniest people I’ve ever met. I wish we could have stayed in touch, more. Still, I’m going to miss you, buddy. To the family, may God be with you in this, your time of loss. Whether the peanut allergy was there all along, or developed later on, take solace in knowing that, however unfair it may seem now, it was all part of God’s plan, and that Joe is now there with Him, smiling down upon us.  Also,  I know a great lawyer, whenever you’re ready to deal with that restaurant.

-X, From X.

Comment 2: Little brother, what can we say? Mom, Dad, Trevor and I are missing you so badly right now, there are no words. I’ve been dreaming of you every night for a week now. I wake up crying, at least once a night. My brother, my best friend, I feel as though we knew each other better than anyone else. We shared everything; secrets, laughter, dah, dah, even each other’s beliefs.  And so I know that you wouldn’t want to be considered to be with God right now, since there is no (telelological argument is bunk…etc)  rational reason to believe that God exists, what with the concept of God being something that humanity must grow out of …dah dah blah.

-Forever your sister, Julie

Comment 3: Joe, miss you so much already. Not sure why humanity would have to grow out of religion, Joe, considering that the very foundations of modern western ..civilization were largely built upon Judeo Christian principles.  The soul does exist, I assure you Joe, as you now know very well; it has  has survived your death, meaning that you have not disappeared, but rather, have transitioned. …there need be no proof of where you are right now, or Who you are with, because I feel it, we all feel it, we all just know,   epistemological…sceience has, and never will, be able  to explain everything, because science , too, exists only because of God. Proof is not necessary for that which we already know. And I, for one, know you are in heaven, not in some dark abyss of non-existence.To make that leap of faith. The theory of evolution itself is a leap of faith, the gaps in the fossil record have never been filled. Joe, I remember the time….do you remember? I’m sure you do, and I’m sure you’re smiling down at this post right now, even as I type, since the soul does exist, has survived your death, meaning that you have not disappeared, but rather, have transitioned. …there need be no proof of where you are right now, or Who you are with, because I feel it, we all feel it, we all just know,   epistemological…sceience has, and never will, be able  to explain everything, because science , too, exists only because of God. Proof is not necessary for that which we already know. And I, for one, know you are in heaven, not in some dark abyss of non-existence.

Comment 4: My deepest condolences to the family. Miss you, Joe.  However, the burden of proof lies not with the atheist, but rather with the other side. (has to get barbed here, probably already should have been getting there. Speed this the fuck up.) I am not literally addressing Joe right now– he exists no more– but rather, am addressing the concept of Joe.  Though the concept of Joe may exist, it does not mean that Joe still does, in any real sense. No more so than that teapot orbiting the sun. “There’s a teapot orbiting the sun.” There, I said it. It would now be up to me to prove that. Until then, there would be no rational reason to believe it to be so. Joe would not believe it, and did not believe it, as one of the enlightened few who refused to join the ranks of the mindless multitude who live their lives beneath the dictates of an invisible and angry teapot circling overhead. I get into all of this indepth on my blog, Miss you, Joe.

NOTICE: We ask that guests refrain from linking to websites that are irrelevant to the mourning occasion. Please re-read the guidelines. Thank you.

-The team

Comment 5:  Joe, being in heaven, as you are, and being now privy to nearly all human knowledge, I for one am just glad that you realize that something as complex as the human eye could not have come about randomly. Explain how something as complex as the human eye came about by chance. Oh, Joe, how I wish you could come back to do that for all of us right now. But as you know, being that you are in heaven, and now know all, such a thing would be impossible to do. Because the one next to you right now, God, is the only explanation for the human eye.

To the family: my sympathies are with you. My brother’s guestbook was also recently overrun by religious zealots attempting to force their beliefs upon my family. Here goes the very best fact about religion causing murder you can find. Original.

To the family of the deceased: I did not have the good fortune of having known either Joe, or any of you, but still, my heart goes out to all of you– take solace in knowing that Joe is in God’s hands, now.  my name is rabbi —-. i just happened to come across this guestbook, and it is always in my interest to stop the spread of disinformation regarding my religion. no where did..say…leviticus; 23, in fact, we are told, ‘dfjjfdjdfjdfjdfj.’ tht is all.


To the family…irreducible complexity….

(I thoroughly explain all of this on my blog, My thoughts are with the family right now.

-Sheldon, ….

My apologies. (lights a candle)

-Sheldon, Akron

I  never really knew Joe, or the family, but my thoughts are with all of you. My name is Rabbi Boteach (change) of the ____.  I just happened to stumble across this guestbook, and would just like to quickly point out that no where in the Torah is it said that God condones….etc…This is pure myth. Leviticus: 23:1 teaches us that God _____, for __- __–. You are perpetuating misinformation, Sheldon. This is not good. Please know the bible before you speak of it with an air of such authority.and Big bang, what was there outside of this ball the size of a///baseball? There is no answer to that.    God bless.


Infinite regression is not addressed. Who designed the designer?  Just because we don’t have the answers yet, does not mean that we should give up searching. To the family, there are certain people who are just close-minded, hopelessly so, and it is these people who are setting the human race back. Joe i remember the time you crapped your pants…and stuff..


Comment 6:

Comment 7:

Comment 8:

(Comment 9:)

(Comment 10)

To suppose that the eye could have been formed by natural selection…

the eye.

Everything was contained within something (size of baseball, make this beautiful), then big bang, and 4 billion galaxies came into existence…what was outside of it? (no one seems to know…?)

To Joe’s family, my deepest condolences. Jerry is just drunk right now, I can tell, he always gets like this…begins mixing uo losing focus

Joe, I remember how we… Todd, so like a theologian to resort to ad hominem tactics.

science too is based on 2 faith based propositions: 1. we live in a rational universe.  “lawful” universe. language of mathematics.

Atheists have to take these things on faith in order for make their belief .

concept of god removes free will from pic

The dials of the properties of the universe thing. Rate of expansion of the universe, per Hawkings. Fool with the dials even the slightest, and everything goes out of existence. No life. No universe. Maybe. “The universe seems to be kind of a giant conspiracy to produce, and i think we owe a little bit of a thnk u note togod for that one” -Dinesh D’sozuza

why is it that humans accomplished nothing until biblical era kicks in? hm? pyramids…cathedral of…

almost seems as though x2,000 years ago some kind of transcendent entity entered the world and breathed …

genital mutilation is purely  in the province of religion


About questionnothing

This blog is going to be slowly formed. But it will turn into something amusing soon. I'm a writer, working on getting into some serious literature publications right now, but as I find time, I'll start to do the blogging thing. This is my experimental go at it. When I really get down to it, things will get serious, very quickly. In a good way.

Posted on April 22, 2011, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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